This includes a range of approaches to managing conflict and tensions in a way that repairs harm and mends relationships if and when those relationships do break down. The book shares advice on how to put behaviour right when it goes wrong in a more positive, less punitive way, and, more importantly, on how to get it right and keep it right in the first place. Furthermore, it advocates an approach that is collaborative, empowering and positive - and ultimately geared to improve motivation, engagement and independent learning in even the hardest-to-reach young people. This episode is about restorative practice in children's social work. It covers what restorative practice is, what it looks like in practice with children and families and in an organisational culture, and what it might mean to implement it as an individual practitioner as well as at a service-wide level. The guests are Mark Finnis, founder and director of L30 Relational Systems (https://l30relationalsystems.co.uk/childrens-services/) and speaker, author and coach, and Mike Hayward, service manager for professional practice at Dudley Children's Services. The questions were asked by Joanna Silman, senior content editor at Community Care Inform Children. Mike has a particular interest in the development of restorative approaches in early help services, children’s safeguarding social work and services for children who are looked after. Mike has and continues to play a key role in the development of restorative approaches with front line social workers, managers and colleagues from health and education. He has a particular interest in the application of RP in services working with young people with learning difficulties and disabilities and has worked with specialist services to develop this approach.

The start of the day as students arrive can often be the busiest and most unsettled part of the school day. Getting involved earlier in the life of any problems can often help you have fewer problems later. Be more proactive and less reactive. He is well aware that there are those in schools who see relational approaches to behaviour as a “soft” option. However, that simply isn’t the case, he argues. Use a statement that uses ‘I feel’ not ‘you make me feel’ because the second one creates blame. Make sure you separate the act from the person so you still value them as a person.There are still consequences for poor behaviour, but the focus is on finding a resolution to understand the impact, meet people’s needs and move things forwards. In this way, you can be authoritative but not authoritarian. Working restoratively isn’t about having less authority but it is everything to do with how you exercise that authority. Ensure you call out good behaviour before you highlight negative behaviour. Earlier, we talked about attention needing behaviour, and in truth everyone needs attention and would not want to be ignored. Therefore, if a student is behaving, highlight their positive behaviour. When highlighting their positive behaviour be specific so they know and the class know why you are pleased with them. When we say Challenge, we mean things like setting limits, outlining boundaries, defining expectations and explaining consequences. We’ll then draw things together by asking the ‘needs’ questions. What needs are there, and what needs to happen to repair damage and allow us to move forward? What’s more, relationships are both simple and hard in equal measure, so it’s easy to direct our focus onto the more tangible areas of school life – such as results – and, in doing so, fall into the trap of forgetting that not everything we count counts, and that not everything that counts can be counted.

Next, we’ll ask who has been affected and how, and follow this by examining and exploring the impact on people and relationships. It’s about using relationships to prevent behaviour incidents, rather than something you implement once an incident has happened.

It would be really insulting to teachers to say they’ve never thought about relationships, but it’s about moving implicit practice to explicit. The top left-hand box is when you engage in high challenge, low support practices. It describes when you are doing things to young people. ‘Just do this and you’ll pass the exam.’ ‘Just get on with it as I showed you.’ ‘Do as I say, not as I do.’ This is the ‘TO’ box and the original version uses the words ‘authoritarian’ and ‘punitive’ to describe behaviours typical of this style of practice. We’ll then get on with our lives, thinking that something has changed and lessons have been learned, and that we’re all bigger and better because of it. Repeat. Mark's words inspire courage and a belief that small changes will have a huge impact. Restorative approaches are not just for resolving conflict, and this book suggests many ways in which it can be built into day-to-day interactions throughout a school. Restorative practice is not a 'soft' or easy option, and the structures suggested in this book guide the reader through its many functions and possibilities.

Finnis: While restorative practice and restorative justice have similar values, beliefs, skills and practices, they aren’t the same thing. When searching for a solution it is important to not return to the issue that brought you there and seek to blame again. Instead, try questions like: Through restorative practice, we should try to ‘know our children well’, and if you knew Josh well, you’d know he has trainers on because he can’t afford a proper pair of shoes and is embarrassed by this. Josh is late today because he drops his sister off due his situation at home, meaning he has to. I am relentless and passionate about working better together to produce brilliant work for great clients. This comes through a fusion of ideas, dialogue, relationships, expertise and irrepressible energy.

Carlie originally graduated University after studying for a Drama degree, whilst at University Carlie worked in Prisons which was where she first discovered the power of relationships to transform lives. Not only do smiles make us feel good, they have the tendency of getting passed on to others. A simple positive greeting can have an impact on all the things we want to improve: learning, behaviour and, most of all, belonging.

For those educators who are uncomfortable with the punitive world of zero tolerance, isolation booths and school exclusions, Mark Finnis – one of the UK’s leading restorative practice experts – is here to show you that there is another way.

Recent Books

You can watch a video where Mark discusses the social discipline window (high challenge, high support and 'working with') here: https://youtu.be/34XUCoI-xu4