They got permission from them earlier." The motherly angel pointed at Dr. Gabriel and began "Maxine Gabriel, she just got out of an abusive relationship. She made a promise to God that day that she would do anything to prove her gratitude." She then pointed at Dr. Rosenberg and said "John Rosenberg, he has been doubting his faith and asked that God prove his existence to him in any way." It used to be that seeing babies made me sad after I lost Jonas, but now when I see a 2-year old I still feel a slight pain in my heart. Sometimes I don't even think about it, but other times I can't help but think that Jonas would be that tall and that terrible. ;)

Samael went and helped him up again. "Just can't stay on our feet today, huh Dean?" he asked teasingly.

Alright, she seems to know those things" Jonah said handing the Sam imposter an ID. The man who called himself Sam placed it into the duffel at his feet. Hello Miss Campbell, I am Dr. Gabriel,” said the tall blond woman "I will be delivering you baby and this is Dr. Rosenberg." She said indicating the short brunette man standing next to her. "He is a top neonatologist. We need to deliver this child now since you are awake but we need you to finish filling out the forms first. Your brother already started them but there were a few details that need to be filled in." When Dean lifted his head one of the doctor's was walking towards them. He was updating them on Bobby's condition now, probably trying to get his organs again. Dean couldn't seem to focus on anything but the wall. He didn't even notice when the doctor walked away and he only pulled himself out of his reverie when Sam tapped him on his shoulder. While society often focuses on how women cope with a miscarriage , many men experience similar feelings of grief and loss. The emotions that come along with a partner losing a pregnancy are hard to explain. One year ago today, I was ready to meet Julien, my rainbow baby! I would be heading to the hospital that night to be induced. I was so scared but so relieved for that stressful pregnancy to end with a beautiful breathing baby! After a very long and terrifying labor, our little Julien Reese entered the world and entered my arms and entered into a family who needed him so very much. He filled a void in my heart and I'm so glad he's mine. So happy first birthday tomorrow, Julien!

The postpartum rooms have beautiful mountain views, which I think will be so peaceful and so surreal for me after giving birth to my rainbow baby. I'll never forget the view we had the day that Jonas was born. It was a typical rainy German day. So cold and so dreary. The curtains opened up to the German hillsides--so green, but surrounded by fog and a gray, wet sky. It looked exactly like the way I felt. Some sun could have done me well, but there was none to be found for at least a month. Such dark days...it's still so difficult remembering what happened and how crushed I was inside. They all are some of Heaven's best healers, sent to you to ensure that our daughter would have a few hours with you before returning Heaven." Castiel answered wrapping his arms around Dean. Well… because she is a nephilim she is unlike any other preemie. If she were a normal preemie you would be over-stimulating her just through talking to her and not to mention touching her. She is so much stronger than another preemie and if her name hadn't been placed on a reaper's list she would be able to heal herself." Haniel explained as she ran her fingers through Dean's hair

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Dean didn't to know what to say, so he changed his subject. "Who are these angels that brought me to the operating room?"

I'm so sorry this had to happen. Why did it have to happen? Something so unfair with such gut-wrenching pain. No one should have to bury their child. Please don't tell me it's God's will. Because the immediate thought is, "What kind of God would take a child from her mother?" I don't believe it's God's will. I believe it's part of residing here on Earth, which is full of so much pain but also full of so much joy and beauty and love. I believe that because it happened, God will use it for Good...somehow. That's just what I believe. I don't claim to have the answers, though. I will find out for sure someday when I'm reunited with Jonas.I've been missing you a lot lately. Maybe it's just the holidays. Knowing that our little family will always be minus one no matter how much fun we're having. Maybe it's all this difficult stuff we are going through. It all started with you. I don't want you to feel bad about that. You had no choice in the matter. I will never blame you. But life has never been the same and never will be. I hate being 2.5 hours away from you. When I want to go see your final resting place, I can't. I can't even make sure it's clean and organized. I hate picturing you under the cold ground. I know it's not you under there...you're somewhere far better. But I wish you at least had a blanket or something. :( The mention of my child's name may bring tears to my eyes, but it never fails to bring music to my ears. If you are really my friend, let me hear the beautiful music of his name. It soothes my broken heart and sings to my soul. from On The Beach At Night As the time passed Dean wrapped Cas' coat tighter around his body. Putting his head against the window, Dean allowed the noise of the Ford's engine lull him to sleep. It's you!" Dean said, pointing an accusing finger at the angel in question. "You're the Sammy imposter from the ambulance." I'm 28 weeks now! As soon as I hit 30 weeks, I will feel relieved. I've said that with many weekly milestones..."as soon as I hit 13 weeks (chance of miscarriage goes down)...18 weeks (my big ultrasound)...24 weeks(the baby has a chance of survival if born now)...and now I'm thinking 30 weeks. Not sure why. Maybe because it feels so close to the end! At 28 weeks, I am getting so close. Just a few more months to go.