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Friends Plaque Friends Are The family We Choose Ourselves Friendship Birthday Gift SG1919B

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Your chosen family is the group of people who always have a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. They’ll never let you face your problems alone. Your chosen family is a reminder that love is the most powerful force in the universe. It’s a force that can conquer anything. The concept of chosen family is a powerful one. Whether you’re searching for a sense of belonging, a support system, or simply a group of people who make life more enjoyable, your chosen family is there for you. When you find your chosen family, you find a support system that will help you weather any storm. They’re the ones who lift you up when you’re feeling down.

Sounds romantic, doesn’t it? And it is. But if you’re married or have been, you know it takes more than that to make a marriage work. Because we continue to grow and change, and it’s important to allow ourselves and our partners to grow, but to also grow together. Surround yourself only with people who lift you higher because friends are the family you choose yourself.” If you’ve been reading my blogs/columns for a while, you likely see my standard pattern. I introduce a topic, talk about it, maybe get into different aspects, then I wrap up using something from the beginning. When life gets tough, your chosen family will be there to lift you up. They’ll remind you of your strength and show you the way forward. Your chosen family is the group of people who know you better than you know yourself. They can anticipate your needs before you even ask.You don’t have to do exactly the same in your writing. However, you don’t want to leave strings dangling, either. But because I’ve done this for years, I look for ways to tie the beginning to the ending. Usually, it comes easily. If it’s clever, all the better, but usually I’m content to just get in a mention again that brings my article full circle. Life is a journey, and it’s much better when you have your chosen family. They’re the ones who make the ups and downs worth it.

Thinking about it, I often end up as an emotional sounding board for others. It can be draining and one-sided, so I know I need to make a conscious effort to create boundaries and seek out people who are good listeners too – a community I am finding through my creative life with fellow writers. Friendship is not about who you have known the longest; it’s about who walked into your life, said ‘I’m here for you,’ and proved it. It’s one from which I’ve sought to resign. Conversations in these groups have more layers than a millefeuille, with many getting external validation from being liked and supported by the posse. Of course, there are many who thrive within this dynamic, but what if you struggle with it? Baker says that rather than expending all your energy on others, try tapping into your intuition to assess what you truly need from your friendships. This often is my way of writing. I don’t necessarily plan where I’m going. Sometimes, I do, but more often, I have a vague idea of what I want to discuss and the points I wish to make.

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Rachel Michaelson, 42, an actor and mental health coach, says: ‘When I was growing up, I always wanted to be in a girl posse. When I met my husband at university, we had a group that we belonged to, but I never felt as if I fitted in. While I was training to be a coach, I experienced a shift in attitude. I realised that I didn’t need the validation of a group. If people are meant to be my friends, they’ll find me, and that seems to have played out. I’m attracting the right sort of people now with the right energy. If you don’t feel comfortable in a group dynamic, don’t feel pressured to conform. I spent years doing that and wasted a chunk of my life. Now I have friends who genuinely want to be in my world and give me as much of their time as I give them.’ Next steps Friends will be friends but they soon go away, family is family and always they will stay.”- Carol Joseph Friends can be the extra layer of support we need, because at times we can tell a friend things we don’t feel able or ready to disclose to family yet. Why is this? Because a friend isn’t as invested in the outcomes of our lives as family is. (To be fair our parents gave up a lot of themselves to have us, so their investment and inability to see us fully as a separate people to them is understandable… sorry mum! Lol She would point out that we also never really see our parents as people separate to us either. Touché. haha) Friends love us with a degree of separation that allows them to be happy for us (instead of worrying for example that we are rushing into something, taking on too much responsibility or too much financial risk/spending, or stand to get considerably hurt etc…) When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching – they are your family.” – Jim Butcher

We don’t always get to choose the people we’re related to, but we do get to choose our family. And that’s what makes it so special. When people read content – fiction, non-fiction, news, whatever – they want to know what happened. Leaving questions unanswered is unsatisfactory to a reader. Perhaps you’ve read a book or seen a movie where a plot point was introduced then completely ignored. You’re left wondering what happened to a character or situation, and it’s not a pleasant feeling. It’s not that diamonds are a girl’s best friend, but it’s your best friends who are your diamonds.” – Gina Barreca

In marriage, you start with a friend. It grows into love, then you decide this is the person you want to wake up next to every day for the rest of your life. So, you get married. But, there are people that have an incredibly close relationship with their friends. These people trust their friends above all others, including family members.

If there ever comes a day when we can’t be together. Keep me in your heart. I’ll be there forever.” – Winnie the Pooh In this post, I used some examples of how my friends and I support each other. When I wrote it, I didn’t intend for it to be the wrap, but as I got to the end, it presented itself as a good way to tie the beginning to the end. You know you’ve found your chosen family when they accept you for who you are, flaws and all. They see the real you, and they love you even more for it. How people define what makes a good friend is likely to depend on their circumstances. A very busy person is likely to value someone who doesn’t require much time and attention, whereas someone who has more free time will value friends who have more time to spare. A person with a good family support network will probably not expect as much physical support from friends such as babysitting or transport for example, and may become easily overwhelmed by a person who doesn’t have that strong family support and therefore searches to have those needs met in friendships.Family isn’t just about DNA – it’s about the people who stand by you when you need them most. That’s what chosen family is all about. Friends are the ones who make you feel like you’re part of a family, even if you’re not related by blood. A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.

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