Doing Life with Your Adult Children: Keep Your Mouth Shut and the Welcome Mat Out

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Last month my husband did a surprise visit to my daughter and boyfriend’s home, we have a 3-year-old granddaughter living there. That’s why it’s so important to set an intention, to think about what this might look like and set clear boundaries.

I would like to see more blogs on what adult children can do to have healthy relationships with their parents. The big problem happened when we had a lockdown during Covid and my son asked if his girlfriend could stay over during that time. They’ can send you away and you will only be able to see the new happy family from afar; the outsider looking in,” says Byford.I felt disappointed, frustrated but calmly told him that he should take his responsibilities first over fun, paying the assessment and paying off for his car. Even though he has never asked for anything, we understand he makes limited income and so support him financially with a fixed amount every month. I have no problem helping if necessary, if planned, but am quite annoyed that she does not see the importance of being there for her children first and boyfriend second. Before she moved back the last time, I gave her my expectations – work and be home during the week and help out when you see something that needs to be done. I don’t want to live in the city she lives in because there are no doctors and I found there’s a lot of pollution.

I lost my father at 17 and I try to talk to her about her elderly grandparents, etc but she does not care. Annette Byford’s ‘Once a Mother, Always a Mother: On Life with Adult Children’ (Ortus Press) is out now. HomeWord helps families succeed by creating Biblical resources that build strong marriages, confident parents, empowered kids and healthy leaders.We’re going to discuss the importance of understanding the differences between us and our children so that we can have healthier conversations and become the kinds of parents they need and want for this stage of life.