Learning from set-backs is the key to raising resilient children and looking back over the list over a period of time can help them to grow from these events.

ways having a child destroys your life – in the nicest Five ways having a child destroys your life – in the nicest

For anyone who is pregnant, or trying to weigh up whether or not they ever want to be pregnant, this is a really helpful insight into what you might experience and - importantly - that all of the negative experiences and emotions that you may go through are NORMAL and OK! The author also points out in the introduction that having children is something that happens to people every hour of everyday making truly unexceptional, except, of course, to every parent it feels exceptional. It’s a very honest and raw read at times and Ellie covers the whole experience conception, birth, the discrimination mothers face, discrimination non-white mothers face in healthcare treatment and expectations as a mother. I actually expected this to be a bit funnier (and don't get me wrong, I smiled many times while reading this), but I did appreciate the seriousness and honesty as well. Never again will I need to worry about anyone seeing if my new spherical vase is, in fact, a ‘bouncy ball’.

Helping children become resilient means giving them the tools they need to cope with uncertainty and bounce back when life gets tough.

My Child and Other Mistakes: How to ruin your life in the

I remember in the newborn days, something I hadn’t anticipated, I felt like I really missed my husband, because you become like ships in the night. As someone without kids I wasn't sure I'd appreciate this book as much as I should, but I was very wrong.Children thrive on routine, predictability and boundaries - when they lose these factors in the long-term, and the reasons why can often by unavoidable, it can be a difficult time for parent and child. Resilient children are less afraid of making mistakes and more prepared to take risks – because they can cope with having got it wrong.

My Child and Other Mistakes Ellie Taylor on her new book, My Child and Other Mistakes

But the book isn't 'worthy', it's a personal account where Ellie wants to encourage people to be ok with whatever choices are right for them, including whether not to have a child at all - and with some of the stories Ellie tells it might encourage them down that route! Admittedly, I'm not really the target audience as I don't have any particular interest in children and am not a mother. Completely honest, real, funny and thought provoking - I found myself laughing and crying (sometimes at the same time) and at some points I seriously felt like I was reading my story.This wasn't really the case, as once the author becomes pregnant she's more or less assured of her decision (which is a relief I suppose! It features things that you yourself thought, that you yourself doubted but did not find easy recognition in anywhere else. For example the realities of maternity and paternity pay, or the racial disparities across birth fatalities.

My Child and Other Mistakes: How to ruin your life in the My Child and Other Mistakes: How to ruin your life in the

I read this over a few long nights with my 4 month old and it felt like she was writing my innermost thoughts that I didn't dare to say aloud. That said, she also successfully manages to ensure that the writing feels easy to connect to and is consistently humorous, and therefore, not a difficult read. This is a story told from the heart and there are some truly emotive moments in which Ellie Taylor shares her tales of motherhood with all the grisly, painful, and heart-breaking details.Ellie knows how to make you laugh and cry (maybe that's just my hormones) but her honesty on all aspects of pregnancy/parenting have really helped me understand that I'm not alone for having these thoughts and worries and that it will be fine in the end. Becoming a parent heaves the remains of your old life into a skip, covers it in petrol and flicks in a lit cigarette. As well as releasing her debut book today, Ellie will be taking her stand-up tour, Don’t Got This, on the road later this year. But what I do know, is that the child I have has been worth all the mess, all the noise and all the destruction. I have no idea whether I’ll end my life being a mum of one or a mum of two, or perhaps a mum of one and then surprise twins, or maybe a mum of one and owner of new tits.